Why sleep can be harder
Sleep problems are extremely common in autistic, ADHD, sensory and anxious children. NHS guidance notes that sleep difficulties affect a high proportion of children with SEND, often because of:
- Differences in melatonin production
- Sensory sensitivities (lights, sounds, textures, temperature)
- Anxiety, racing thoughts, replaying the day
- ADHD brains that struggle to "switch off"
- Co-occurring conditions (eczema, reflux, asthma, epilepsy, pain)
- Medication side effects
Sleep deprivation affects mood, learning, behaviour, anxiety and the whole family.
A calmer bedtime routine
- Keep the same order of steps every night — bath, pyjamas, teeth, story, lights low
- Use a visual bedtime chart so the child knows what's coming
- Wind down for at least 30–45 minutes before sleep
- Dim lights, lower voices, slow movements
- Turn screens off well before bed (blue light delays melatonin)
Sensory tools that often help
- Weighted blanket (only if age-appropriate and safe)
- Compression sheet or sleeping bag
- White noise, brown noise or a fan
- Blackout curtains
- Cotton, seam-free pyjamas
- A safe comfort object
Night-waking
- Keep responses calm, brief and boring — minimal lights and conversation
- Same script every time ("It's still sleep time. I love you. Back to bed.")
- Check for pain, hunger, toilet, temperature, sensory triggers
- Track patterns in a sleep diary for 1–2 weeks before changing things
When to ask for help
Talk to the GP if sleep problems are persistent and affecting your child's day, especially with snoring, breathing pauses, severe anxiety or suspected pain. Some areas have specialist SEND sleep services and charities (e.g. Sleep Charity, Cerebra) that offer parent support.
Do
- Keep routines predictable
- Validate fear without arguing it away
- Plan for recovery — your sleep matters too
Don't
- Don't punish night-waking
- Don't change too many things at once
- Don't compare to neurotypical sleep norms
Small steps matter. Support matters. A tired family is not a failing family.